A Milestone

I noticed that this will be my 200th post. It made me think about why I started writing this blog. It wasn’t to write interesting stories. You see I have never been that great a writer. Hell, I don’t have any real artistic ability at all. It wasn’t to communicate with people all over the world. I didn’t even know that other people would read my site, let alone be reading it over a year later. So if it wasn’t artistic and it wasn’t communicative, then why did I write my first post?

I did it to pass the time. That is right. I was bored at work and needed something to pass the time. I was consulting for a company and they put my project on hold, but did not want to fire me. They wanted to wait and see if the project would start up again. So they had me come into work everyday and look busy. So I did. I did this. I wrote every day, but more importantly I read every day. I read your blogs. I got to know some of you through your writings. I got to know your pain, your joy and everything in between. I started to see what this outlet could do for a person. Do for me.

You see, I had recently split from a 10 plus year relationship and my behavior was part destructive and part self pity. I was living in self denial and was not facing life or the hard decisions I had to make. This site helped me to change a lot of that. This site and a heavy dose of my family. Spend anytime around them and it will make your life seem fantastic (kidding – don’t take me off the Christmas list, yet). I can honestly say that this site has changed my life, which means that some of YOU have also changed my life. You know who you are!

I looked back through my postings as I wanted to see what I had written and how my writings have changed. I decided to pick one post that was significant for me. One post that I am proud of or some how aided in changing my life. But, which one should I pick.

I could pick the three part series that was my 20’s. I felt proud to finally be able to write or tell anyone that story – this was the first place anyone every heard it – but that isn’t as important to me as some posts.

I could pick one of the fictional stories I wrote as I am proud of them all. Mainly because I never thought I could write in that manner and now I am hoping to someday finish a book.

I could choose the post I wrote after meeting my blogger brethren on the East Coast. That night was special to me and the overwhelming support and friendship I immediately felt for all of them was very important to me.

There are 199 posts to choose from and the one I believe was the most important to my growth, my transformation, my healing was this one. All though many of you might think this is fictional, it really happened to me. All of the emotions I describe were real to me. It was a big turning point for me. It was the day I realized that I would be alright. That I could find someone to love. That someone special exists for us all. I know it sounds sappy, but after three failed long term relationships, I was ready to quit on the whole idea of love. Hell, I had quit. This day, these 15 minutes profoundly changed my attitude about my life.

I am sure that if I had not written the first 100 posts and spent time getting to know all of you I would never have gotten to a point where those 15 minutes would have happened. I really think that you are just as responsible for my turn around as I am. You have been my confidants, my friends. Thanks for sharing my life.