Nick

I haven’t had much to write about lately, so I thought I would share a few of the conversations I have had with Nick over the years.

Nick called me out of the blue one day and this is how our conversation went:

Nick: “Dad, I just wanted to tell you that you don’t have to worry about me anymore.”
Blue: “Really? Why is that?”
Nick: “I am no longer living below the poverty line.”
Blue: “Great. How much money did you make last year?”
Nick: “Fifteeeen thousand dollars.”
Blue: “Nick, just where do you think the poverty line is? You will need to make a lot more money than that to get above the poverty line.”
Nick: “Really?”

Sometimes ignorance really is bliss.

From the first story you can probably gather than money is not a big motivating factor in my son’s life. He tends to lead a very simple, bohemian like lifestyle. As long as he has money to pay rent and buy beer, he is usually happy. He doesn’t own a car because public transportation can take him everywhere he needs to go. He likes to shop at second hand stores because other stores are overpriced. And this brings me to my next story.

Nick and I were walking down the street in Seattle on one of my many visits there.

Nick: “Hey dad, see these shoes?”
Blue: “Yeah,” as I look down at them.
Nick: “Fifty cents.” He said so proudly.
Blue: “Yeah, but Nick, somebody else wore them.”

One of the things I truly admire about Nick is the comfort he has with himself. He seems to know himself and understand what he needs to be happy in life. And he is not willing to settle for something because it is convenient. This really shows up in his romantic life. Even at his young age, he is willing to wait for the right person and not be with someone just to be with them. So when he introduces me to a girlfriend, it is usually someone he truly likes.

We planned to meet one night in Seattle for dinner and he asked to bring his
girlfriend along. I agreed, of course, and then the following conversation happened.

Nick: “She was a little nervous about meeting you.”
Blue: “Really?”
Nick: “Yeah, but I told her not to worry, you pick on me a lot more than she does and that she would have a good time.”

The scary part is that is so true. I think Nick and I have a relationship that doesn’t quite fit into the normal father – son category. Maybe it is because we are close in age for father and son. Maybe it is because he lived apart from me practically his whole life and so our time together was not always parent to child like. Either way, I am happy for the relationship we have and the fact that Nick still sees me as his friend and still likes to hang out with his dad.

At that dinner, Nick was talking about their weekend plans to go to some happening in Seattle. He was excited because they were giving away free cheese at the event. We all laughed and had a great dinner. After dinner as the three of us were having a drink at the bar, I gave Nick this piece of advice.

Blue: “You know Nick, I realize that you are young and that this bohemian lifestyle you lead seems pretty cool right now. And I can see that the girls think you are pretty cool, but one day you will meet a girl and she is going to want you to be able to take her to dinner. And pay for it. And not just take her places because they are giving away free cheese.”

One of the common interests that Nick and I share is music. He obviously is into it at a very different level than I am, playing in a band and trying to make a living at it. I am happy to just listen to it. I remember that as we wandered our way together around Spain and Portugal a few years ago, we spent many a days and nights discussing music. One of our conversations went something like this.

Nick: “The only good music ever made was made in the 60’s.”
Blue: “What?”
Nick: “The music made today and over the last few decades is all crap. The guys in the 60’s really knew how to make music.”
Blue: “Are you crazy?”
Nick: “No, Bob Dylan and Neil Young and all those guys they really made good music. Today’s musicians are all crap.”
Blue: “You know every generation that comes along thinks that the 60’s were this magical musical time. Have you ever stopped to think that the reason the music from the 60’s seems so great is that today you are only hearing the great music from the 60’s.”
Nick: “Huh?”
Blue: “Well there not playing the crappy songs from the 60’s on the radio today. I grew up in the 70’s and I can tell you that the music they play from the 70’s on the radio is only the great music from the 70’s. They aren’t playing 'Disco Duck' and 'Convoy' on the radio anymore and you know why?”
Nick: “Why?”
Blue: “Because those songs sucked! But they played the hell out of them in the 70's. You want to judge today’s music, I say wait 30 years and see what they are still playing. That will be the great music from today.”
Nick thought about this for a few minutes and then he said, “You know that is a really good point.”

I will admit that much of what I find fascinating about Nick he seems to have gotten from his mom. Not that he and I don’t share a lot of traits, but I think he gets his laid back attitude and his artistic ability from his mom. I have often thought that his mom would have been happy to run away and join a traveling renaissance fair when she was 17. Nick always seems to have a bit of that attitude in him. Sometimes I wish that he shared more of my drive to succeed and get ahead in life. I believe those characteristics are within him, but they are definitely secondary to some of his more artistic characteristics. I honestly believe that as long as he was able to play music and hang out with his friends, he would be happy. And at the end of the day, can any parent say that they want anything else for their child?

The Rose

I promised an update on The Rose and I always keep my promises. It has been almost five months since we first met, so I think we have gotten know each other pretty well. Here are some random thoughts about her and many of the things I find so irresistible:

• For the most part, she tells you exactly what is on her mind. This is refreshing as I don’t have to spend all my time trying to figure out what it is that we are REALLY talking about.
• She is very self aware and, as someone who thinks of himself as being self aware, I really appreciate the fact that she knows her own tendencies.
• She doesn’t like any science fiction shows or movies – I mean she has never even seen “The Matrix” – but she never misses American Idol – amazing!
• She is always the first to realize that she has overreacted to something and is the first to apologize for it. This usually doesn’t take days, but rather minutes.
• She always puts the TP roll on upside down. Don’t laugh, there is an upside down.
• She is very smart and in tune with the things that are happening in the world, much more than I am.
• She is fussy and likes things done her way – like all women I have ever known.
• She is unbelievably sweet and kind to people even when she doesn’t have to be.
• She is very sassy and never misses a chance to pick on me. And she certainly doesn't let me get away with anything.
• She will not admit that she has ever been wrong about anything we have discussed in the last five months. This is actually pretty cute.
• She is a horrible typist and I need my secret decoder ring to carry on an IM conversation with her.
• She enjoys good food and good wine and is a very good cook.
• She is a Virgo, but with a Sagittarian moon so, despite conventional wisdom that we wouldn't get along, we share some important traits.
• Oh, and of course, she is beautiful. I truly enjoy the "What is she doing with him?" looks I get when we are together.

As far as an update on us, well things are good. Our schedules don’t always allow us to see each other much during the week, but we spend a lot of time together on the weekends. My friends told me a few months ago that they have not seen me this happy in a long time and I can assure that The Rose is the reason why.

I Hate Always Being Right

Has anyone noticed that gas has almost reached $4.00 a gallon – and likely has in some parts of the country? Is my post from March 22 starting to resonate with you? Once we get used to $4.00 a gallon, then they will slowly raise the price to $5.00 a gallon. This is the same thing they did to get from $2.00 to $3.00 and now $4.00.

I would also like to point out something else that most of you might have missed. I saw the list for the fortune 500 companies and probably to no one’s surprise, Wal-Mart is number one. But guess what company was number two? Yep – Exxon-Mobile. But here is the rub of it. While Wal-Mart pulled in a little more in revenue for 2007 – $351B to Exxon’s $347B, guess which company was most profitable. Yeah, Exxon. They made $40B in profit in 2007. In case you missed that let me say it again –that is FORTY BILLION! Wal-Mart only made $11B in profit. I am not sure, but I think Exxon could afford to lower the prices of gas just a bit.

Oh and let’s not forget the other gas companies – Chevron is number 4 on the list and made $17B in profit. Conoco Philips (76 Stations) is number 5 on the list with $15B in profit. Even the little known Valero Energy was 16 on the list and made $5B in profit in 2007. Please don’t tell me that these petroleum companies need to make this much money in PROFIT every year. Don’t worry, I am sure that they use these profits for the good of all mankind. I am sure they will spend most of it on lobbyist and politicians to ensure that any clean air or alternate fuel legislation never gets enacted by Congress.

I am really starting to wonder why this is not regulated by the government. Talk about taking advantage of a situation. They really have us over the barrel.

Casual = Beach?

Maybe it is just me, but there is a very disturbing trend happening in my office right now. I have noticed that more and more people are taking the “casual” dress to a disturbing level. Don’t get me wrong, I am the first to wear a pair of jeans into the office. However, I usually wear a shirt with them, but the way things are going around here lately, I may be able to just throw on some cut off shorts and wear some Birkenstocks to work – not that I would be caught dead in Birkenstocks. I am just not sure when “casual” became beach wear.

I work for a web company, and I expect that the creative people here are going to be, well, a little kooky. And believe me, they are. But some people are taking the relaxed dress a bit too far. I thought it was strange that someone, during my day one orientation, was wearing flip flops. But that seems dressy in comparison these days. Maybe it is the fact that I have spent my career talking to customers and not stuck in my cubicle, but I don’t think that you should wear tank tops to work – men or women. I don’t think that mini skirts are appropriate – I know I can’t believe I am saying it either. I am really sure that you should not wear the $1.99 flip flops you got for buying three bags of groceries at Safeway. We are a large company and I really think there should be some standard of dress. I say bring back the shirt and tie era.

Wow, I am getting old.

A Good Golf Memory

Quick story from the golf trip…I was playing the first morning with three guys. Four of us went out to play while we waited for some of the others to arrive. There was a round later that afternoon with the entire group, but for some reason, the four of us seemed to think we needed to cram a sixth round into the weekend.

I knew one of the guys in the foursome, but I met the other two that morning. One of the new guys started out the round struggling very badly. I waited until about the 5th or 6th hole and then I asked him if I could give him some advice. I told him that I could not help him with his swing as I have never played with him and had no point of reference. However, I asked him if he had ever played a good round of golf. He laughed and said yes. I told him that instead of focusing on figuring out what he was doing wrong today, he should think back to that day when he played well and focus on how he felt that day. Think about that day and what he did to play well. I explained that focusing on what you are doing wrong is a common amateur mistake in golf, and he would be better off to focus on something positive.

He began playing a little better over the next few holes. About four holes later after hitting a great shot, he turned to me and said all he was thinking about was the day he got a blowjob on the golf course.

I have to admit, that wasn’t quite what I had in mind when I gave him the advice, but hell, whatever works. I am a little surprised that I needed to remind him to think about that day. If that had happened to me, I would think about it everyday.

This was just day one – round one - of the trip. Imagine what happened after that.