How do you feel? That is the question
But I forget you don't expect an easy answer
When something like a soul becomes initialized
And folded up like paper dolls and little notes
You can't expect a bit of hope
So while you're outside looking in,
Describing what you see
Remember what you're staring at is me
Cause I'm looking at you through the glass
Don't know how much time has passed
All I know is that it feels like forever
But no one ever tells you that forever feels like home,
Sitting all alone inside your head
How much is real, so much to question
An epidemic of the mannequins
Contaminating everything
We thought came from the heart,
But never did right from the start
Just listen to the noises (no more sad voices)
Before you tell yourself
It's just a different scene
Remember it’s just different from what you've seen.
Maybe I am reading too much into it because this is how I’ve been feeling lately. I feel like I haven’t been living my life. And when I look at myself from the outside, what I see is someone who is just trying to make it through – day by day. And now the part of me that “doesn’t know how much time I have spent living in my head” is starting to notice that there is another part of me watching and wondering. Wondering how long I can continue to avoid my life. Wondering how long I can continue in this self pitying state. Wondering when I will take a chance. Wondering when I will open myself up to possibilities again. Wondering when I will begin to live again.
And as I see him looking impatiently at me through the glass, I realize that enough time has passed.
1 comment:
Self pity? I would prefer to think of this concept as 'introspection', without which we would not view and review ourselves--thoughts and actions--and ever change. That is why we FEEL! Remember? :)
One day, when I am feeling extremely brave, I'll tell you what these lyrics mean to me:
http://www.windupinvasion.com/exodus/hello.html
And here is a good one for that (my turn) "introspective" mode:
Selling out
Is not my thing
Walk away
I won't be broken again
I'm not
I'm not what you think
Dream away your life
Someone else's dream
Nothing equals nothing
Letting go
Is not my thing
Walk away
Won't let it happen again
I'm not
I'm not very smart
Why should I feel sad
For what I never had
Nothing equals nothing
Chorus:
Turn to stone
Lose my faith
I'll be gone
Before it happens
(repeat)
Selling out
Is not my thing
Walk away
I won't be broken again
I won't
I won't fall apart
Dream away your life
Dream away your dream
Nothing equals nothing
(chorus)
...
If you can guess who performs the song, I'll make you dinner AND bring good wine (if you check Google, you'll have to deal with your conscience!...but enjoy a nice dinner, right?)
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