One of THOSE Travel Days

Yeah it is one of those days. It starts with a 5:45 AM alarm so I can head to the airport at 6:30. I don't like to get up before the sun unless golf is involved and 5:45 definitely came way to early this morning.

I get to the airport and as I pull up to the parking ticket machine, the only one of three open for the main garage, it gives me my ticket, but the gate doesn't open. So I sit and wait...and wait. I push the help button and when the man answers I tell him my predicament. His response, use one of the other lanes. REALLY?  Open one and I will. All of the cars behind me had grown tired of waiting and had turned around and gone to the secondary garage. I did too.

I parked the car and surprisingly someone I knew parked his car next to me. He was one of the drivers behind me at other the parking entrance. We used to work together, but he moved to a different company about six months ago. He was headed north today while I was headed west. We walked to the terminal together using the few minutes to catch up. It always amazes me how many people I run into at the airport. Maybe it is the fact that I travel quite a bit as do many of the people I work with.

So I reach the terminal, check in and head to security. The line doesn't seem that long. I am in one of the obscure security lines at IAD that has limited x-ray machines. Things are moving OK, but apparently the people in front of me have not traveled since 2001. They had no idea that they needed to take off their jackets or shoes or that they might want to buy a stroller that might fit through the x-ray machine. I get through the line and head to my gate.

Oh, did I mention I was flying on Southwest today. Not my usual airline and I really can't remember when I flew them last. Well they are in one of the new terminals and the "walk" there is rather long. I finally reach my gate after stopping for some OJ and a bagel.
Now I don't know how many of you fly Southwest, but I don't think they could make their boarding process any more difficult if they were trying. I get the boarding in groups thing. I was in group C - not good for getting a good seat. As the boarding process began, the rather bitchie man working for Southwest explained that not only did we need to board by group, but also by number. I looked at my boarding pass and realized that I was actually C18. They actually expect everyone to line up in order, because if B13 boards before B9, then they cut in line. I am not kidding. The lady taking the tickets actually looks to make sure they are in order. If you are out of order, she makes you wait your turn.

So they herded in the first group, A1 to A30...then the second, A31 to A60. They did the same with the B group. So 120 people got on the plane before my group was called.

When they called the C group to line up, only 5 of us were in line. Now you have to imagine that they have the carpet sectioned off, this area is for 1-5, then 6-10 etc...I was standing in the 16-20 area as I am pretty intelligent and understood the ridiculous system. However the 60 year old Spanish lady behind me, C22, could not quite grasp it. She didn't understand why we needed 40 feet of empty carpet between us and the people by the door. That is when Bitchie began berating her. Telling her she needed to stay in this section because she was C22. He wouldn't let it go and he didn't seem to grasp that she didn't understand. Take it easy on her, I don't think her primary language was interior decorator and there were only 5 of us in the C group. I don't think her going before me was going to make me lose that prime middle seat.

You know I don't care if you don't like your job or if you life partner was an ass all weekend, if you are going to work with the public on a daily basis, you should learn to be more patient with them. Understand that you boarding process is ridiculous and not exactly intuitive. There will be some people who just don't get it. They aren't trying to cheat the system, they are just trying to get on the plane.

Now some of you may interpret my color commentary to mean I have a problem with gay men. I don't. I do have a problem with people who want to be a bitch before 8 AM.  I mean come on, the sun is barely up, none of us needs that crap this early in the morning.

Oh and I have a note for the people running Southwest: Assign seats for pete's sake. Isn't it time to admit that the idea of first come doesn't really work well for air travel.