Well it’s official. The lease will be signed today. I am going to the management company this afternoon to sign my lease and give them a deposit. The big empty space is all mine. It took them half a day to approve me for the apartment. And they didn’t even care that I had a bird, go figure. I think they were desperate.
I called my ex and told her about the place. She looked at the pictures, asked about the train noise and told me the place needed some paint. Then we laughed, because I have always wanted a place like this, and she wished me well. She is a great woman. She also said she would be happy to give me the pool table back as it is just taking up space in here storage area. As a bonus, she wants me to take the big screen TV as her brother just gave her a new TV. So now I can scratch TV off the ever growing list of things I need. I will have to sit on the floor to watch it, but all any guy needs is a big screen TV, right?
It’s strange, but we both seemed to get what we wanted. She got to live on a ranch – well close enough – and I got my loft in the city – well close enough. It's a shame that we did it at the expense of our relationship. I know there were many reasons why our relationship ended, but I am not really sure what they were. Oh, I know the superficial reasons, but I am unsure what the root reasons were. Ah, just another excuse for self examination and discovery. I'm sure I will be pondering this one for a long time.
On a fantastic note, “B” left a comment on my blog and I see that she has arrived in San Diego and all with life is well. San Diego has a way of making you feel great all the time. OK not all the time, but how can you complain about constant sunshine, beaches and beautiful people everywhere. OK the last part is fictional, but I am trying to continue the California myth that all the beautiful people live here. In reality, it’s not true. As someone who has LIVED, not visited, in many places, I can tell you that there are more beautiful people in many other areas than here. The Beach Boys wrote one song and everyone has believed them for 35 years.
So the slow, steady progression of life goes on. Don’t get me wrong, my life is not depressing or melancholy, it’s actually fantastic. It just seems that when you experience traumatic life changes, they seem to happen slowly. They drag on. You just wait for the day when you will wake up and find yourself in a new, wonderful place in your life. That never happens. The trauma is always there. But instead of fighting it or wishing it would go away, you use it, learn from it. You become stronger. You become a better person. Life goes on. By the way, anyone else ever notice that when you are going through these experiences, that the days in your life seem to drag on and on, but the years seem to fly by. You just wake up one day and realize it has been two years since your life ended – and you are still here. Or is it just me?1
1 Please note that this entire paragraph is just my opinion and not meant to sound like a commercial for Scientology - sorry Tom. Also note that I have been known to be full of shit.
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