Mental Snapshots

I used to work as a sales engineer for a company in California. My job was to support our European groups in their efforts to sell the crap we made. I was the only member of this organization that was in the U.S. We had a large office in London and one in Scotland. It is funny that I don't say England and Scotland - like London is it's own country, well V, I guess I am as bad as those people who think of Europe as one country. Anyway, what was my point again?

Oh yeah, when I first took this position, it was a promotion so I had already been working for the company for 18 months, I began speaking to people in the European offices daily. The people in London were no problem I understood them from the first phone call. Their accent was very easy to understand and all I needed to do was learn the definition of some of the words they used (like saying cheers instead of goodbye). Now the Scottish employees, quite a different story. We were both speaking English, but I don't think it was the same English. For the first month, my conversations with Scots went like this:

"Gh rhet ejkd tnje hjkegdisr fk dghtry."
"Can you say that again?"
"Gh rhet need tnje hjkegdisr by dghtry."
"Can you say that again?"
"Gh rhet need tnje hjkegdisr by Friday."
"Can you say that again?"
"We will need that hjkegdisr by Friday."
"Can you say that again?"
"We will need that paperwork by Friday."
"Ok, no problem, I will make sure it is there."

You get my point. The funny thing is that after a month, I knew exactly what they were saying. I guess I got used to listening to broken English spoken at ninety miles an hour. Now there was one woman that I spoke to in Scotland almost daily. It was actually quite pleasant to speak to her in a strange erotic way. You see, she had the best 900 number voice I have ever heard in my life. I always felt like she should be charging me $2.99 a minute for our conversations. She is talking about some order that a company in Germany wants filled and all I am thinking is "wow, this is one sexy voice."

I began to imagine what she looked like. A beautiful Scottish lass with auburn hair and long legs and green eyes - I don't know, maybe Maureen O'Hara in all those early John Wayne movies. After a month or so, one of the guys at work asked me if I had spoken to her on the phone. He commented on her voice, but warned me that the mental image she conjures in no way resembles what she really looks like. On my first trip to Scotland, I found out what he meant. She did not look anything like I imagined. Actually she looked more like I imagine most of those 900 number operators really look.

Now, I tell you all of this because I think it is in our nature as people to imagine how people look in real life that we have non-visual contact with. A mental snapshot of them per say. Maybe it is more of a guy thing as we tend to be more visual and so I think we always imagine what the girl on the phone looks like. Or in the case of blogisphere, I imagine what each of the ladies writers that I visit regularly looks like in real life. I also have a few ideas about the guys as well, but that probably won't make as interesting a story. I will say this about the guys - I am sure that Loon looks exactly like Brad Pitt, anyone who gets laid that much, must look like Brad Pitt - but back to the ladies.

How do I come up with this mental snapshot? I don't really know. I think it is just all the little things that each of you write about or allude to in your writing daily. They all seem to add up and then one day, I have this image of what I think you look like. I have always been someone who pays attention to the details around me. That and my obsessive need to solve puzzles or problems add up to the creation of this mental snapshot of each of you. I am perfectly happy to see this snapshot in my mind whenever I read your blog or a comment that you have written on my site (hoping this is not too creepy).

Then something weird will happen. I will be watching a movie or TV or reading a magazine or on the Internet and I will see a woman and, in my mind, I think, my God that is Bran. I used her, because it happened with her first. I wasn't trying to find a real life photo of my image of Bran, it just happened one day when I was on the web looking around. Now every time I read her blog I see the same picture in my head. The same thing has happened to me with three other people - MartiniLove, Jasika and That Girl. Not that I don't have a mental snapshot of a lot of you, including Sex, Stoli, KelBel, Mellow, the Perfect Woman in NYC, Boston Rambles and AmberLynn - some of you more vivid a snapshot than others - I just haven't had the experience of seeing that image in print yet that makes me go - it's her! There are a few ladies who I have not included, because I either know what they look like or you can get a pretty good idea from their photos on their site.

So, here are some of my thoughts on the four of you and the photos that sparked my epiphany. The weird thing is that, in my head, you do not look like every picture of these people but you do look like these particular pictures.

Bran - I always imagined her with brown hair and brown eyes - perfect nay-nays - someone who is creative and clever - who looks like she is having fun all the time - someone who is beautiful without knowing it. Here is what I see when I think of her.

Bran

MatiniLove - I always imagined her with blonde hair and blue eyes - her hair is long and is capable of becoming a bird's nest at inopportune moments - she is sassy and sarcastic - up for anything and friendly - I see her as a typical SCal girl who is nothing close to typical, even though I am pretty sure that is not where she lives. Here is what I see when I think of her.

MartiniLove

Jasika - I always imagine her with black or dark brown hair - it is somewhat wavy because she straightens it - she has dark eyes - she looks exotic due to her heritage - she is classy and a little intimidating to approach. Here is what I see when I think of her.

Jasika

That Girl - I have always pictured her with brown hair and brown eyes - with olive tone skin - someone who is tough and sweet - can look through you with her eyes - despite what she thinks, men are attracted to her for more than her awesome rack. Here is what I see when I think of her.

That Girl

Now I am sure that there is the possibility - however remote - that I have completely missed in my mental snapshot of each of you, much like I did with my coworker in Scotland. That's OK, I can live with that. I am also sure, having gotten to "sort of know" each of you, that you will each say, "I wish I was that beautiful in real life." Remember that I get to read about the real you - everyday. Your inner you. I get to read all the things that make you funny, clever, sassy, intelligent, witty, sarcastic, sweet and classy - basically I get to see the beauty inside each of you. So it is easy for me to imagine that you are all as beautiful on the outside.